Fraying

Cravings : Bacon

I think I'm currently in one of those spots. Been feeling my "singleness" pretty keenly over the past couple of months. The fact that almost all of my close friends are attached (or soon will be) plays a part in this as those the not so subtle jabs and pokes from family. To be honest I sometimes dread going to gathering's with my friends, not through any fault of their own... but when we're together... I can't help but realize that I when I turn to my side all I see is an empty space. It's been a bit sucky too as it sorts of spills over into other stuff. Just the other day I wasn't invited to watch a show with some friends, which was understandable coz well I was watching another show. Somehow however, I felt this incident very keenly. Perhaps because I had wanted to watch the show and mentioned it a few times, or maybe it was because I knew I wouldn't have anyone else to watch the show with, or just maybe coz I felt that I wasn't even thought off...I don't know. Felt pretty darn sucky....luckily by the end of lunch I had managed to shake myself out that stupid mindset.

I think part of my current predicatment is that I have quite a few close friends of the opposite gender, and when they get attached we sorta lose the closeness. Which is understandable, coz there are new boundaries that have to be drawn. I'm happy for them at the same time a little sad coz I know things aren't the same. Also my issues with my trying to move on from my past interest hasn't been going all that well. Sigh...sucks to be in this melodramatic, emo kind of mood. Hope I get out of it soon. I mean just reading the Naruto chapter where I thought Hinata died (which still may happen, but the next issue gave some hope for her survival), I couldn't sleep till 4am. Sucks man.