Double Vision

Craving : Real Food!!!!

Phew! What an amazing 6 days it has been. I've just gotten back from Teenstreet Malaysia today, and what an experience it has been. I've been able to see God work in the lives of so many youth and got to meet so many great and wonderful people. Dan and Suzie Potter along with Curt and Nikki really brought a new way of challenging the youth with their dance and drama, and I think many of us who were there are able to better remember the teachings with the concept of the Kingdom code.

Going as a coach, I was excited and nervous. This was the first Teenstreet in Malaysia and I really wasn't sure what to expect. I knew that my NET or care group during the camp was going to be a pretty diverse one. I was going to have only 5 youths under me, 2 of which came from my church. The other 3, came from different churches and I had never met them before. I was so afraid they wouldn't get along together, but turns out...I was wrong and most of the group gelled pretty well. I have to confess there were many times when I felt unsure of myself and it just felt like I wasn't getting through and the youths weren't sharing, when suddenly one of them would say something that totally blew me away. I may not have seen it then, so blinded I was by own worries and rely on my own abilities that I wasn't seeing God working in their lives. Looking back now, I can fully appriciate and see the little victories in each of their lives. So Peter, Jian Sheung, Eu Jin, John, Bryan...I'm praying for you guys. Thanks for being an awesome NET!

The past 6 days have also been a time of soul searching for me. There has been so much that I have had to deal with. I went as a coach expecting to faciliate the youths, and found myself being challenged and being forced to deal with issues myself. I've had to re-examine my life and my walk, questioning if I really have been heeding God's call and if I truly have been allowing God to work though me. I have begun to see the importance of having a NET of my own, a group of my Christian peers which will keep me accountable to them. Hardest of all has been the issues I have had to confront in my own personal life. Sometimes what God asks of us is not easy, and I have had to make a couple of those decisions over the past days, and I tell you it is hard. It is not easy letting go, trusting God to be in charge, especially when it comes to friendships. Because you never know when God says, "hey...I don't think you should be so close anymore" or "I think it would serve my purposes better for you to go seperate ways" or something along those lines. It's painful, I would be lying if I said it wasn't, but maybe God had already being giving me signs.....and I just didn't want to take it. That been said...I guess I am once again learning about unconditional love....and about caring for people eventhough they don't respond, or they don't care about it. He really is an awesome God...and following Him is not easy...I can only pray that I can keep to the narrow path...by HIS strength.